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The last time I saw your face was at the airport. I can’t remember our last kiss or embrace, but I know we had them. You didn’t walk me inside or board the plane with me, but you never wanted to, did you? The nostalgia I felt on the plane ride home was excruciating. Did I really just see you? Am I going to wait another two years until I see you again? I wanted to relive that weekend with you over and over again, but I could never stay for good; not that you would’ve wanted me to, anyway.

The last time we spoke, we didn’t really speak. We went from constant communication throughout our days to very little and with such a drastic change, I couldn’t take it. It was hard enough to try to withstand the physical distance that was between us, but you created a distance further than I could bear. I always think to myself, “I would’ve loved you,” I could have, but now I never will.

I once had such high hopes for you and I, but now I am left with nothing. To care for someone as much as I did was something I had never done before and you’ve helped me create another piece of armor to keep people out. I’d like to think that all that happened was just a dream because I have never dealt with reality well, but I know that everything happens for a reason, no matter how cliche that may be. So thank your everything you showed me and the nothingness you left me with.

I could’ve loved you; it would’ve been a good one.

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