Hey, love.

The sun is peeking its head through the window and though the room is filled with a chill and beeping throughout the night, you’ve managed to stay asleep. You’re on a bed across from my own and looking quite handsome as usual; though I may want to wake you up so I could get a good morning kiss, I know you need the rest. It’s been a hard few months and you’ve stayed strong by my side; I know I could never thank you enough.

You held my bucket whenever I felt sick and told me I was beautiful after you shaved all of my hair off. I felt like I looked like an alien, but you helped me feel like the most beautiful extraterrestrial around. I felt embarrassed the first time I threw up in front of you and even more so the first time you had to help me get into the shower. You always loved my slight curves and you were still gentle once my body became frail. Every night we’re together in the hospital you kiss me goodnight and I know that if you weren’t here, I would never find a smile on my face.

Do you remember the first dose of chemotherapy that I got? My mood was pretty glum at the bad news and how fast it seemed to be coming, but your hope somehow gave me hope, even though I was scared out of my mind. Never did I think I would get so ill so young, but here I lay. I stare at you, still sleeping, and try not to cry knowing that one day you will wake up and I won’t. The doctors have told me that things aren’t looking good and I can’t find it in me to face this reality or even let you in on it.

I’d like to just watch you sleep forever. I’d like to dream that we will have a forever, but I know time is running out. So, love, won’t you wake up, just for a few minutes, and give me a kiss?

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